Last year, way back an odd phone call came through, well more odd than normal as most of my calls are a bit that way. A charming man who's name escapes me clearly educated at a very nice school said he'd seen my piece in The Times (I'm getting around a bit these days) and a German Drugs Company would like to feature me in their annual report... now my mind flashed forward to airport, first class ticket, luxury hotel, VIP treatment and a few days off... followed closely (of course!) by 'being an inspiration to people' (something I'm a bit sheepish about) Naturally driven by point one I said yes!

All went quiet but true to his eloquent word he called back the drug people were a go and they needed some images and a few words.

'The Germans are coming' I announced to the unsuspecting team. They are sending two people, here for one day to take my photo and have a bit of a chat! Unbelievable!

The morning of their arrival I spent an extra 30 minutes de-tangling my hair and finding a bit of bling, trying desperately to achieve that 'I haven't really tried look', really as if I always have perfect lip outline!

Around 11 the most charming duo screeched into the car park in some hire car with brakes clearly they were unaccustomed to and by the tone of the illegible slightly terse conversation likely to have been on the wrong side of the road since the airport. However they turned on the charm and went about a marathon photo session the likes of which would exhaust Kate Moss.

I pleaded that the single shot that they needed surely would be among the 546 they had taken at the halfway mark! In the end I used the 'let's go for lunch' tactic with no intensions of allowing anymore. Suggesting that they take a stroll down the quaint cobbles of Haworth we buried ourselves in the bar of our local hostelry and started to run up a massive bill on their account. Drink was followed by food and we tucked in, it always tastes nicer when you are not paying! 30 minutes in I was getting a little bit anxious that we had lost them and that they had not ordered their own lunch, so I despatched a runner... The upshot of which was that they were vetoing any meal, enjoying the fresh air and just heading for the home, at which point the waitress appeared with our bill... ah well another time...

So here I am looking at the results almost 6 months later and casting a critical eye over myself, the crows feet, aging skin, the hair (god wish I had had my roots done) then ZING all of a sudden the teeth! I reminded of Ross in friends.... say no more.

I’d like to thank Boeringher Ingelheim, the magnificent photographer and sidekick, Abbie at the Clothes Shop for the lovely tunic, the team who were very patient and found the whole thing a bit bemusing (and had to buy their own lunch), but most of all those wonderful people at Adobe, for the master programme called Photoshop the creators of the whitest teeth I have ever had.

PS If you have Parkinson’s Disease or any negative condition don’t worry take it from me it will be fine, you will find a way forward. I have, and if you need some help just ask colleen@minecreative.co.uk

You can view the report on the Boehringer Ingelheim website (page 52).